We are the champions, Rawk the Puck-style


With the Ducks able to clinch the Stanley Cup tomorrow night, it only seems fitting that we bring the marathon Rawk the Puck 2007 tournament to the end. A big thanks to all of the panelists and people who participated. The voting, like most hockey blog traffic as teams got eliminated, dropped with each round, but damn it, I had fun, so the JABS Memorial Cup will be contested again next season. But for now, it’s time to either inspire the Ducks to win it all or inspire the Senators to come back with a hard-fought final round between songs representing the San Jose Sharks and the New Jersey Devils.

Before we get to the play-by-play and vote tally, let’s take a look at how these two teams got here:

San Jose Sharks
First Round: Dead Kennedys, Holiday in Cambodia (cause they’re from the Bay Area) defeats Nashville Pussy representing the Nashville Predators. I think some people think that band’s name is Paul Kariya’s nickname.
Second Round: British Sea Power, Remember Me (the sea, cause we’re stretching for anything ocean/sealife related) defeats Skid Row representing the Minnesota Wild. I was actually really surprised that arty indie rockers beat out awful-but-fun hair metal. What do I know?
Third Round: PJ Harvey, Down By The Water (again, ocean/sealife related) defeats New Pornographers representing the Vancouver Canucks. Another scenario where I thought Vancouver’s favorite indie band would strike down Ms. Harvey, but apparently Vancouver music fans stopped reading hockey blogs once Roberto Luongo hit the golf course.

New Jersey Devils
First Round: Spinal Tap, Hell Hole (HELL, where devils come from!) defeats the Lightning Seeds representing the Tampa Bay Lightning. Soft, warm, and fuzzy Lightning Seeds didn’t stand a chance against the almighty power of TAP. It’s the majesty of rock!
Second Round: Bruce Springsteen, Jersey Girl defeats David Gilmour representing the New York Islanders. You either love or hate Bruce, but David’s fans must have been on an acid trip when voting came and went.
Third Round: Van Halen, Running With The Devil defeats Lynyrd Skynyrd representing the Atlanta Thrashers. I should have told David Lee Roth about this — he’s just crazy enough to maybe make a guest appearance on this blog.

Tonight’s matchup: The San Jose Sharks, represented by School of Fish’s 3 Strange Days, vs. the New Jersey Devils, represented by Bright Eyes’ Devil Town. And the puck drops…NOW!

Period 1
Chris (New Jersey): If i’m rating the 1-on-1 here, it’s School of Fish. Cool, swirly tune that does rawk some – more than Bright Eyes’ kinda somnolent drowse. But Rawk the Puck! is about the bench too, and here’s what we have: Devils (Springsteen, a true icon; Van Halen, a joke; Spinal Tap, a mockumental joke; and now Bright Eyes, a decent though overhyped indie star) against Sharks (British Sea Power, a great band still building a catalogue; PJ Harvey, culty and not my cup; Dead Kennedys, a cult act I do get and quite like, but geez they make me feel old; and now School of Fish, one-album wonders cut down in their prime).

So the vote goes to the Devils – last year’s Rawk the Puck! champs defend. Sharks just don’t have the depth to match the Boss and the Tap.

Sherry (San Jose Sharks): Somewhat shamefully, I do enjoy a couple of songs by Bright Eyes but “Devil Town” isn’t one of them. It makes it all the more easier to vote for School of Fish, since everytime I see Conor Oberst and his pretentious haircut, most of what I hear coming out of his mouth is “WHINE, WHINE, WHINE”

Period 2
Carla (New Jersey Devils): Well, for me, the finals turn out to be pretty anticlimactic. ‘Cause there’s just no beating Bright Eyes’ cover of Daniel Johnston’s “Devil Town”. It wins (4 sets of clapping-) hands down. Not just for the weird innocence of Johnston’s lyrics and melody, but for Bright Eyes’ adaptation of it, including that truly great squeally guitar (or is it a violin?) bridge a minute and a half into it–wow, that’s sweet. Plus, that’s a righteously groovy video. Contrariwise, I don’t get the appeal of the School of Fish selection. Meh, it sounds like a million other songs. As far as I’m concerned, hand the JABS Memorial Cup to Jersey, Mike. (I’d wear gloves, though, if I were you. I suspect Chris didn’t wash the damned thing before he gave it to you.)

Greg (San Jose Sharks): Bright Eyes — this is pleasant enough, but… the song never really seems to get going. Kind of like the Devils! Har! Ok, that didn’t make any sense… the School of Fish song, meanwhile, is good ol’ one-hit-wonder ’90s stuff. The kind of band that sounds great on one song, then it turns out everything else on the album sounds like a weaker version of the same thing. (Kind of like the Shar…. oh, never mind.) In the end, neither team brings their a-game, but…SHARKS WIN

Third Period
Mike (San Jose Sharks): Conor Oberst had a brief brief brief brief brief stint with The Faint, and that should in theory put him past his whiny folk front now. But, it’s got no effect against the awesomeness of School of Fish. Ok, actually, I can’t say School of Fish is that awesome cause they’re really not. But I’m still mourning the Sharks and their stupid stupid stupid blown opportunity. So I’m going to vote for the Sharks because I am stupidly loyal to the end.

Reader vote: Bright Eyes with a whopping two votes (Conor’s internet connection must have been down) and School of fish with seven votes.

Your final score:
New Jersey Devils: 2 + 2 = 4
San Jose Sharks: 7 + 3 = 10

The Sharks can’t hold on to a lead in real life, but when it comes to Rawking the Puck, they are the champions! And you know what? I bet Mark Smith actually knows who all of these bands are! In honor of Mark and the Sharks, here’s a clip of Mark’s band going all aboriginal RAWK on you! You think he smokes a lot of pot?

Now that the important championship is over and done with, I suppose we should prepare for game 5, huh?


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